Thursday, March 29, 2012

Character Of The Day

On my way to work this morning, some guy driving a 2010 Mustang and smoking a cigarette for a stretch of about two or three miles, pissed me off and I'm talking royally pissed. It wasn't a road rage moment either. He didn’t cut me off or anything. Didn’t slam on brakes. Nothing like that. It started out innocent enough as I drove behind him listening to Lady Gaga’s Poker Face. I was genuinely fascinated by how he smoked his cancer stick.

I watched him with his left arm out the window, cigarette pinched between index finger and thumb. You’d have thought he was smoking a joint.  The arm didn't stay out long though. It seemed like every two seconds his arm would go back inside the car for a puff, then...arm back out the window, flick ashes, arm back in car two seconds later. This went on until I had to turn. However, right before I made my left turn, this guy chucks his filthy cigarette out his car window and it hits my car! WTF??

I have a convertible, so can you imagine what could have happened had I had my top down? That butt and its fiery tip might have managed to find their collective way into my car! Why are people so inconsiderate?

Okay, imagine this.

What if it landed on my lap and I swerved off the road and hit someone? Would it be my fault?

What if I was on an errand to retrieve a gallon of gasoline for a sweet old lady broke down on the side of the road somewhere? What if said cigarette butt found its way into my car then? I don't know. What if it maybe managed to ignite the gallon of gasoline I'd just purchased, leaving my husband a widower with two motherless children?

What if these were the 1980's and I'd just sprayed a fresh load of Aqua Net onto my big hair? What if the cigarette butt managed to find its way into my car then? Do you think my 80's style hair would ignite, leaving me wrecked on the side of the road because I'd tried to save my hair from melting off the top of my head?

That was the only character worth talking about today. Why? Because I was so pissed that I’ve remained in my office the entire day so as to not have to deal with people. I'll shake it off eventually, but for now, I better remain at a distance.